The Point of Getting Married

All over my timeline on multiple social media platforms, I see this question followed by heated debate: what is the POINT of getting married?

There is no benefit, people can’t be trusted, the divorce rate is too high, it doesn’t make economic sense! Even engaged couples are bombarded with comments like: “make sure you see the world first.” “ready for the old ball and chain, huh?” “Just learn to say ‘yes dear’ and everything will be ok.”

Is there really nothing more to it than being tied down to one person forever? A good economic proposal? Is the point just to walk on eggshells and make your wife happy so you’re happy? And what if they stop making you “happy” ?

So, today I present this post to the believer who is struggling to see marriage as a blessing and feeling discouraged with the bombardment of negative messages surrounding marriage:

Five Biblical “Points” for getting married.

1. To represent to the world the relationship between Christ and the Church — the marriage union is a sacred covenant and symbolic of Christ’s Union with His Bride, the Church. (Ephesians 5:22-33)

2. To experience unity between a man and a woman that cannot be experienced in any other way but marriage. The Hebrew word ‘yada’ means deepest knowledge possible of someone. God uses this word for how well he knows us, but he ALSO uses it to describe sexual intimacy between husband and wife. It is a gift for the right context: husband & wife. (Matthew 9:5-6; 1 Cor. 7:1-5; Hebrews 13:4)

3. From that unity, to produce godly offspring to continue a generation that loves Christ and spreads His gospel. (Malachi 2:14-15)

4. To be a team and advance the Kingdom of God. And to make disciples; first priority is making disciples of your children by sharing the gospel with them, then others (Deut. 6:4-8).

5. To become more like Christ, through the sanctifying work of God, as He puts two sinners together in a sin diseased world and expects them to fight sin together by allowing the other person’s failures and sins to grow their own character. Selflessness. Holiness, not “happiness” is the desired end result of marriage. (Ephesians 5:25-27, Romans 12:10)

Since God designed marriage with a specific purpose, the ultimate goal is to bring Him glory through it, by following His design. Of course, this doesn't mean that the happiness and the joy you are able to bring to each other by serving them isn't a blessing - it is just the icing on the cake! 

Marriage isn't permanent, but it is a means God uses to prepare for eternity those He wills to be married. Learning to deny your fleshly desires and put another before yourself is difficult (and a life-long process) but it will make your marriage sweet and fruitful, to the glory of God. For further reading, I recommend "When Sinners Say I do" by Dave Harvey, "What Did you Expect?" by Paul David Tripp, and "Sacred Marriage" by Gary Thomas.